So, I walked out of Walmart the other day. While about 75% of everyone was masked, there were those individual running around without one. I can only assume they’ve been living in a cave, or think they have some immunity the rest of us don’t.

But I’ve really begun studying the masks of people who are wearing them. While the majority are wearing non-descript, functional things, others have gotten really creative.

An example was a girl at the register. Her mask must have been made of printed off a machine material and had lips on it. It fit nicely with her face, and only the added bulk revealed it was indeed a mask. The problem was when she spoke. The lips didn’t move. I hear a voice, but no lip motion. The entire event was a little like watching a ventriloquist in action and was just plain weird!

Then there was the guy smoking a cigarette while wearing a mask. He’d cut a hole in one corner so he could smoke while wearing it. I’m not sure what he hoped to achieve with it, but it reminded me of the joke of how some people wear a mask makes you understand why contraception doesn’t work.

Some of the masks are nothing less than works of art. The fabric is colorful, and the bedazzler has come out of the closet, and the wearer has made the mask their work of art. I guess this is the Covid answer to making lemonade out of lemons.

The most interesting mask was the guy who walked out of Walmart as I was walking in. It was leopard print, and at first I thought, “Whatever floats your boat.” But the more I looked at him, the more I realized there was something really wrong with the mask. He had a strap that went up and over his head down the middle to connect in the back with another strap.

Then it dawned on me.The guy was wearing a leopard print thong over his face.

I’m not sure I want to know where it came from.